Was Edward an idiot to leave Bella in NM?

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deedeedork
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Post by deedeedork » Thu Jul 03, 2008 4:17 pm

Tragically mistaken. He thought that he could actually force Bella not to love him, to forget or get over him. But he was also an idiot to think it would work. <3
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Post by Visitor » Thu Jul 03, 2008 4:59 pm

I think that not only was Edward justified in leaving, he was also ultimately RIGHT!

Because some of his reasons for leaving . . . 1) wanting Bella to stay human 2) questioning her reasons for wanting to turn 3) not thinking she did or could love him as much as he loved her and 4) keeping her away from unnecessary danger . . . were all validated to some degree upon his return.

As to number 2, just look at what we learned about Bella (and what she learned about herself) in Eclipse: For starters, SM came right out and told us that Bella lacks self-awareness. So how could Edward be completely confident about Bella's feelings towards him when it appears that Bella didn't even know her own mind? As he may have suspected before he left, Bella was more fearful and uncertain of turning than she initially let on. The questionable motives behind Bella's desire to turn was made even more obvious by the fact that Bella wanted Edward to change her and potentially damn both their souls while balking at the idea of marrying him. Of course, I don't think that Bella's hesitancy in marriage has anything at all to with her love for Edward. But for arguments sake, Edward may have been uncertain about Bella's motives before leaving, and upon his return, his concerns seem more grounded, not less so.

Reasons 1 and 3 were validated through Jacob. The first being the clearest and easiest to argue . . . Bella could have remained human if she chose to stay with Jacob. There. No more to say. The third is a little more tricky to argue because arguing it implies that Bella does not love Edward as much as he loves her. And I know making such an argument is tantamount to blasphemy in the TW community. But in truth, while Bella did experience more of an emotional breakdown from Edward's loss than most teenagers and adults would have in her shoes, the fact is . . . she was still proving to be more human than not by the sheer fact that she was 'able' to get better at all. Despite her pain, she was forcing herself to go on without Edward in her life. Now does that mean that by going on Bella proved herself incapable of loving Edward with equal intensity? Probably not. But it is a contrast to what his life was like without her. And it does illustrate to a starling degree the differences in the ways Edward and Bella deal with the loss of love. Because many seem to think that Bella could have and almost did move on just fine without Edward. Now would she have been as happy with someone besides Edward? Again . . . Probably not. But then again, what matters ones degree of happiness when the difference between the two is a matter of life and death? I'm sure that Charlie and the others would have been perfectly fine with a less than totally happy Bella, as long as she was an alive Bella. So I'm sorry, Bella proved Edward right in the end. To some degree, she was capable of moving on.

Now out of all the reasons numbered above, the only place where Edward's leaving was not completely validated is in number 4: The danger part. Because if anything, Bella was placed in even more danger upon Edward's departure. But his ignorance on that front is understandable. He did kill James. Laurent and Victoria were never perceived as problems because they were not the ones fixated on hunting and killing Bella at the time. So when Edward decided to leave, the only monsters who could potentially cause Bella harm were the ones located within his own family.

Edward may not have anticipated the vengeful acts of a vampire scorned, (i.e. Victoria) but he was correct in his belief that, generally speaking; he was a danger to Bella and her safety. From Edward's perspective, at the point of his departure, he had both directly and indirectly been responsible for at least 3 Bella near-death misses. One being the very first day they met. The second being James, which was an indirect result of Bella being out in the field with Edward at the time the three wandering vampires came to town. The third being Jasper. Because it's doubtful that the birthday incident would have occurred at all if Edward had not tried to force another "human experience" on Bella. So because of all of that, Edward believed that removing himself would remove the danger, thereby giving Bella a shot at a normal life. And whether she wanted it or not, such a life was almost within her grasp . . . almost.

So I'm sorry, the way I see it, when Edward left, he was not behaving as a bad guy. Or an idiotic guy. Or a selfish guy. He was right. Plain and simple. Which now makes him the guy who could, if he chose to, run around the Lex singing "Na-na-na-na-naaaa-na! I told you so, I told you so!"

Now, with all of that being said, one would think that I would agree easily with this statement from Sasha:
I don't think Edward was wrong in leaving (though I hate his surface reason for it (protect Bella) and the way he did it), but I do think he was wrong in coming back.
But alas, I cannot. Bella went after Edward. And once she did that, Edward would have been five times more callous than any one could claim him to be if he simply let her save his life, let her express the depths of her love for him, and then leave her . . . again. So personally, I think he did the right thing. He put the ball in Bella's court. He didn't say, "Great, you love me too? Good. Now I'm your boyfriend again and that's that." What he said was something more along the lines of, "Even though I love you with all my heart, if YOU have moved on, just tell me and I'll understand." He didn't force himself back into Bella's life, he was granted entry. He can't be blamed for the doors that Bella decided to open.


And to answer SM's question: I don't know if I could believe that Edward truly loved Bella if he hadn't left. Because him staying meant so much more than him just choosing to be with Bella. It meant playing an active role in irrevocably altering her life in one of the most horrific ways imaginable. If that thought did not disturb him . . . plague him . . . torture him . . . cause him to strive for another way . . . . . . . . . I would have questioned the depth of his love for her.
"Why did she have to come here? Why did she have to exist? Why did she have to ruin the little peace I had in this non-life of mine? Why had this aggravating human ever been born? She would ruin me."
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

[b]"So the witnesses first then."[/b]

[i]Edward Cullen, MS[/i]
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Well....

Post by unigirl2489 » Thu Jul 03, 2008 5:28 pm

Although I almost died when he left,
I mean no offence to anyone.
But I think its good because now Bella knows what its like without him and so she won't ever leave him.
But if he hadn't left she might not have known it would hurt so much and she could've gome with Jake :?
Did that make any sence?
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Post by Sugar » Thu Jul 03, 2008 5:38 pm

It was extremely stupid, but you have to see this from his view point. He loves Bella and he only wants to keep her safe and happy. He's lived so long and probably has seen his fair share of tragic romances because the danger one person can bring into a relationship. Sometimes, when you truly love someone, you do have to hurt them in order to keep them safe and that's what he was trying to do. Little did he know that she finds danger all on her own with or without him.

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Was Edward an idiot for leaving Bella in New Moon?

Post by Cullenesque71 » Thu Jul 03, 2008 6:06 pm


Well, sure, he was an idiot.

I cried like a freakin' baby when it happened. But, after several readings and much thought, I don't think he knew that she would MOURN for him that way. Sure, he knew that she would be heartbroken for some time, but I honestly think that he thought she would "get over it".

There have been many comments about Edward's arrogance that no human could feel as strongly as he did...which is possible. I never discount a theory that someone can back up with some evidence. However, I think he was truly shocked by how easily she bought into the "I don't want you" statement. He probably thought, "Well, if she truly believes that so easily, then she must be able to go on without me." At least that's what I hope.

No "great romance" in literature would be without faults, hurts, and misconceptions. That's the reason we're so drawn to these tales. They touch our emotions in a way that is so real it physically hurts us. If Edward had never left Bella, she would not have been able to grow as a character.

So, I'll keep on re-reading these books, and I'll keep on crying when I read New Moon (which I've read fewer times than the other books, just because it's so hard to get through Edward leaving).
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Post by December » Thu Jul 03, 2008 6:31 pm

Cocoa wrote:If I put myself in Edward's place and my husband in Bella's. I would not be able to leave as Edward did. Not because I don't love him as much as Edward loved Bella, but because I have a complete inability to say No to my husband. He, like Bella would have asked me to stay and I would not have been able to deny the request. Does that mean I don't love him? Of course not, it just means I am a jelly fish when he asks me to do something for him.

So again I say, his leaving was not a demonstration of the strength of his love, but rather the strength of his personality or as some would say the strength of
I think you're right: the fact that Edward could bring himself to do it and you could not doesn't say as much about love as it does about character. For better or worse, Edward is terrifically strong-willed; in this respect at any rate, you're not (*grin*). Stephenie's question doesn't point to a truth about love itself but about the particular young man we're expending so much bandwidth thinking about. So let me ask you this (and anyone else who's listening): do you find it an admirable trait in him (or merely a forgivable one), that he can steel himself to say these things to Bella and walk out of her life?
Visitor wrote:I don't know if I could believe that Edward truly loved Bella if he hadn't left. Because him staying meant so much more than him just choosing to be with Bella. It meant playing an active role in irrevocably altering her life in one of the most horrific ways imaginable. If that thought did not disturb him . . . plague him . . . torture him . . . cause him to strive for another way . . . . . . . . . I would have questioned the depth of his love for her.
Beautifully put. And the thing is, being Edward he didn't just strive for another way, he took it. Horrific though it was....
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Post by leela0687 » Thu Jul 03, 2008 7:03 pm

I can see his point of view on WHY he leaves her. He thinks it's better for her and she'll be safer. I don't know if i'd forgive him as easily as she did simply becuase he did hurt her and basically left her life in ruins for about a 6 month time period.

But then again Edward was also in pain it wasn't like his life just continued, he was hurting as well. But I don't understand why he would try to kill himself if he thought bella was dead I mean HE left HER.
My votes for Jacob :-)

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Post by ouisa » Thu Jul 03, 2008 7:18 pm

December wrote: So let me ask you this (and anyone else who's listening): do you find it an admirable trait in him (or merely a forgivable one), that he can steel himself to say these things to Bella and walk out of her life?
I was listening!
and ABSOLUTELY NOT

Of all of Edward's mistakes it is this one that I find most heinous. He lied. He defiled and he denied the one true good and pure thing he has in this world.

In my faith there is a particular sin called "denying the Holy Ghost." It's a pretty serious one, right up their with murder and it's a pretty hard thing to commit. That sin, is when you are given the ultimate precious gift: an audience with god the father himself who tells you you have done so well that he cannot withold eternity and all it's worth from you -- and then to return to that and spit on it and then deny your experience....

It's the same. If this love of Edward's is everything that Visitor describes how can he deny it? And can it really be that much worse than "stealing her soul?'
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December
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Post by December » Thu Jul 03, 2008 7:31 pm

Oooh. You're so right to point out that this not as simple as I've painted it in my previous posts: it goes beyond the question of whether you have the hardihood to hurt someone you love, in the interests of their ultimate wellbeing. In this case we're talking about something that does come very close to blasphemy. Indeed, Edward says as much. "When I told you I didn't want you, it was the very blackest kind of blasphemy." (NM p.510).

The question is....is even blasphemy forgivable in Edward's circumstances? Would you give your soul to save someone else's?
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Post by tookthe405 » Thu Jul 03, 2008 10:50 pm

Edward shouldn't have left but I think it was ultimately good for their relationship.

Through the whole Twilight book, you're just so obsessively in love with Edward and you think he's this perfect guy. But New Moon shows that he's not perfect and he can make HUGE mistakes.

Edward probably thought he could leave because he thought he knew human emotions so well. I'm sure he's heard the thoughts of plenty of Forks kids going through break ups - they mope for a few weeks, maybe a month, and then they get OVER it. He probably thought that Bella would react the same way.

I think the fact that Bella after so many months was still a wreck, still really attached showed Edward that she's legit and probably convinced him that she really wants to be a vampire

So in conclusion, YES it was stupid for Edward to leave but as Stephenie said it was something that just had to happen
"Your hair looks like a haystack... but I like it." - Edward Cullen

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