Things that would never be said in the Twilight Series

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Twilight<3
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Post by Twilight<3 »

Bella: I love you, Edward.
Edward: I love you, too... kind of.
Bella: I- wait.. what?! :shock:
Edward: Well, you see, I've been meaning to tell you...
Bella: Continue.
Edward: Bella, I'm gay and I'm actually in love with Emmett.
Emmett: Hey, hot stuff.

Sorry, first timer at this and it was really random. And no offense to anyone who is gay, I didn't mean it in a bad way.
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Our Icy Affection
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Post by Our Icy Affection »

Seriously LOLing that was soooo funny!

Yet another edition of "scared"

Bella: *scared* What are you doing?
Edward: *drops book* What does it look like I'm doing? It says here in Cosmopolitan that I have to put a donut on my popsicle while slowly drizzling chocolate sauce. Step 1 and 2, complete. Hey, bella love, hand me those marshmellows.
Bella: :shock: :shock: :twisted: :twisted: Why? So I can put it on your family crest and suck em off?
Edward: :shock: :shock: No! So I can eat them, they're so delicious!! Gosh, Bella, if you didn't smell so good to me, I would dump you. You're waaaaaaay too perverted.


Okay, this was kind of weird.
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deedeedork
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Post by deedeedork »

Hahaha omg breath! Hehehe rotfl

Rose- *staring in mirror beside alice* I feel pretty! Oh so pretty! I feel pretty and witty and gaaaaay!
Alice- *stares at her and blinks* Wtf?!
*Bella comes up out of nowhere*
Bella-For I'm loved by a preeeeeetty woooooonderful boooooy!


Oooh geeze. Lame. The things i come up with at 11:00
Okay so we're starting an alternate lexicon to help keep us sane while its shut down. We're prolly going to close it as soon as the lex is back up. And we won't allow spoilers (=
It'd be really awesome if you guys could join and help spread the news! Its still in construction at the moment though!

http://ouralternatelex.friendhood.net/index.htm

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Crooked_Rose
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Post by Crooked_Rose »

^^HAHAHAHA!!!

I love West side Story!
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Our Icy Affection
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Post by Our Icy Affection »

*Rosalie enters edwards bedroom-turned-fashion show/ concert stage, hearing Edward's stereo on high with lots of bass*
Bella: *in Hannah Montana wig with this outfit http://images.starpulse.com/Photos/Prev ... -ds104.jpg* Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days. Everybody knows what-what I'm talking bout, everybody gets that way.
Alice: *comes down runway in this outfit http://www.celebritycrazed.com/images/h ... ontana.jpg* Sometimes I'm in jam, I've gotta make a plan.
Esme: *with this outfit* It might be crazy, I do it anyway. *with music still blaring, realizes Rosalie's in doorway* Erm, Rose, I didn't know how to tell you, but...
Rosalie: You girls are bonding, ya I get it, its just, I've always wanted to do this! *jumps onto stage, already in this outfit* No way to know for sure, I figuire out a cure, I'm patchin' up the holes, But then it overflows!
Carlisle: We're baa-aack!
Esme: Assume the position!
*all clean up and turn off the stereo, end up in "in-case-the-boys-come-back-early" positions*
Jasper: Ya, we almost bagged 4 mountain lions and-*walks into Edward's room, flanked by the other boys, jaw drops*
Alice: Yes, Jazzy? *all girls dressed in this outfit http://i1.iofferphoto.com/img/item/501/ ... inixn7.jpg while reading upside down magazines*
Edward: Hey, Jasper, why so silent? *steps into room, jaw drops*
Carlisle: Oh-my-word.
Emmett: What's happening? *prances into room, jaw does not drop, but sad puppy face comes on* You gu-uys! You promised to wait for me! Ah, well, its a good thing I have this on! *rips off clothing in velcro-like fashion, sings rest of Nobody's perfect song*
All: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
Carlisle: *behind Emmetts back to rest* We really need to visit therapy.
All: Agreed!


Lame I know :D
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deedeedork
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Post by deedeedork »

Hahahaha omg cant...breath.

Edward-*runs out in public during sunny day, wearing only boxers.* Ive got a lovely bunch of coconuts sitting in the rain! BIG ONES SMALL ONES SOME AS BIG AS YOUR HEAD!


Bleh. Im bored.
Okay so we're starting an alternate lexicon to help keep us sane while its shut down. We're prolly going to close it as soon as the lex is back up. And we won't allow spoilers (=
It'd be really awesome if you guys could join and help spread the news! Its still in construction at the moment though!

http://ouralternatelex.friendhood.net/index.htm

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Our Icy Affection
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Post by Our Icy Affection »

Here:

"Isabella Swan?" He looked up at me through his impossibly long lashes, his golden eyes soft but, somehow, still scorching. "I promise to love you forever- every single day of forever. Will you please scratch my back? There is just something I cannot reach!"


Bad I know. It was from Eclipse on pg 460.
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paleskingoldeyes
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Post by paleskingoldeyes »

Jacob: Berries and cream! Berries and Cream! I'm a little lad that loves berries and cream!
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VPnymph
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Post by VPnymph »

Bella: I'm sorry, you're just really not dazzling me today, Edward!

So harsh and un-Twilighty.
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twilight_obsessor13
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Post by twilight_obsessor13 »

Charlie *bored*: Row, Row, Row your boat, gently down the stream, merrily merrily merrily, life's a bout a dream!

Charlie goes fishing with nobody!
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