Imprinting....As good as human love?

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Heart Song
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Post by Heart Song » Tue Jul 08, 2008 6:42 pm

On the surface, imprinting does have its appeal. The idea of finding your perfect partner in life, soul mate if you will, without the heartache of the search is very appealing. If imprinting were possible from both partners I'd say hooray, but it is one sided.

What is a wolf supposed to do with their life while they wait in the slim hope that they will imprint. Their lifespan is so much longer than the average person's. They obviously desire to be in relationship with a partner but there is always the threat of an imprinting occurring. So is it better for the wolf to remain single and lonely or to be with someone knowing that he/she could imprint at any time and devastate their partner. As perfect as Emily is for Sam, we know that he grieves for the pain his imprinting has caused Leah. That grief is compounded now that when they are in wolf form, he not only knows but feels what Leah is feeling. That has to put some stress on his relationship with Emily.

As others have pointed out, it only gets worse if the wolf imprints while married to another. Maybe the wolf's vows should read, "until death do us part or I imprint on another."
Some kind of security going into a marriage that is.

How about another scenario: The wolf imprints on someone who is already married. Assuming that the imprintee is satisfied in that relationship what is the wolf supposed to do?

All in all, as wonderful as imprinting sounds on the surface, I see too much potential for it to be the cause of some deep hurts in the long run.
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NoWorries
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Post by NoWorries » Tue Jul 08, 2008 6:42 pm

I don't think that, had Emily not "chosen" to return Sam's admiration, Sam could have elected to stay with Leah. Once gravity moves, can you ever really put it back? I'm thinking that he would never again have seen Leah in a light even remotely similar to that in which he'd previously seen her. So, in the very least, the imprinter is without options.

I can, in a way, see the point of the pro-imprinters as it comes to choice. The imprintee can elect (I suppose) not to indulge the attentions of the imprinter though, as Jake points out, "who could resist that kind of admiration?" So even though they *could* opt out, the fact that relenting affection is being poured on them *regardless of their feelings on the matter* strikes me as more manipulation (though altruistic, I'll grant) than any "real" sort of love.

The imprintee is effectively being manipulated into returning the affection being lavished upon them. Just because it's perhaps altruistic or, in the very least, unobjectionable to most, doesn't make it any less manipulative. It's a romantic war of attrition.






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Alice_at_Heart
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Post by Alice_at_Heart » Tue Jul 08, 2008 7:26 pm

I think the imprintee could opt out of a werewolf's love. But why would she? If the werewolf is whatever she needs him to be, then it seems like a perfect match. However, if the imprintee does not need love in their life, I believe that the werewolf would not be a lover. (say she's already in a relationship.) He becomes what she needs the most. My question is: If (theoretically) the imprintee needs nothing, could the werewolf still imprint on her?
Also, I agree with NoWorries. The imprinter has virtually no choice. Even if their imprintee opted out. But who would? Someone who needs nothing. But then, why would the wolf imprint?
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Post by MelissaSwitzerland » Tue Jul 08, 2008 7:48 pm

Well said alice at heart! well said!!
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Post by mireya » Tue Jul 08, 2008 8:32 pm

Like most people, I can argue both ways for imprinting but will stick to the pros of imprinting.

The concept of imprinting deals a lot with the question of fullfilling yourself to the best of your abilities in a relationship, because you know that eventually you will have that one person that really loves you no matter what. In a way it is the security that we are all looking for. Imprinting would eliminate the questions and regrets you might feel by the choices that you make in your relationships. Example: "Maybe I should have given it another month; should have dated that guy and not him; I should have waited ...." With imprinting you know that eventually the right person will come and everything will work out despite everything. That is the security that I think we all want in our lives. Knowing that someone is out there for you and you will not miss out on them no matter what happens is truly heartwarming.

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Post by Cullenesque71 » Tue Jul 08, 2008 8:57 pm

mireya wrote:Like most people, I can argue both ways for imprinting but will stick to the pros of imprinting.

The concept of imprinting deals a lot with the question of fullfilling yourself to the best of your abilities in a relationship, because you know that eventually you will have that one person that really loves you no matter what. In a way it is the security that we are all looking for. Imprinting would eliminate the questions and regrets you might feel by the choices that you make in your relationships. Example: "Maybe I should have given it another month; should have dated that guy and not him; I should have waited ...." With imprinting you know that eventually the right person will come and everything will work out despite everything. That is the security that I think we all want in our lives. Knowing that someone is out there for you and you will not miss out on them no matter what happens is truly heartwarming.
I couldn't agree more....you put it much better than I did!
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leahfellinlovwithtwilight
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Post by leahfellinlovwithtwilight » Tue Jul 08, 2008 9:32 pm

Is imprinting as good as ordinary human love? For the imprinter? For the imprintee?
i think that its alittle forced for the imprinter. for the imprintee [hehe] its good that they still get the choice to fall in love "the human way" and get to pick them, or not.

Does it undermine the worth of love if you have no say about it? Does it make a relationship stronger -- or less meaningful -- if there is no possibility that the imprinter will ever fall out of love?
i think it is both. theres obviously a reason you imprinted on them, and i think it may be that you would have fallen in love with them anyway, even if you were a human.

How would you feel about either imprinting or being imprinted on?
it would kind of come off to me as coming on too strong.

What do you think Stephenie wants us to think about imprinting?
i think she wants us to think of it as a good thing. she painted a beautiful picture with sam and emily and jared and kim.
oh, and freekin team jane! hope she finds a nice vampire boy thats not quite as hot as edward, but pretty freekin close!

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mireya
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Post by mireya » Tue Jul 08, 2008 10:03 pm

:lol: Thanks Lisa

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Re: Jacob Imprinting on Bella?

Post by mireya » Tue Jul 08, 2008 10:24 pm

kcats14 wrote:**please forgive me if this point has already been raised... I admit to not having read all the posts on this thread**

I find imprinting very interesting indeed, though I could go either way on the whole "is it good or is it bad" debate.

After finishing Eclipse, I had the notion that Jacob had imprinted on Bella. Before anyone might jump down my throat let me defend myself. There is no question about whether Jacob loves Bella. That is a given, but, as Jacob told Bella, when someone imprints on another, they also become whatever she needs of them, and Jacob has always been exactly what Bella needed, especially during her dark time in New Moon. Even at the end of Eclipse, though Bella had always told herself that she would be with Edward forever, I think what she really needed was someone or something to really make her test herself... that, here, being the Jacob option. She need to know that she was absolutely, resolutely, unyielding in her decision to be with Edward, and as painful as it was for both of them, the strongest test was seeing if her heart could be broken without diminishing her resolve.

On the contrary, once Jacob changed, and he was forbidden to tell Bella the truth, could the others not have known he imprinted? Since he had loved her probably his entire life could the imprinting simply passed as his normal feelings for her? This I do not know; and it could be the major flaw in my theory.

But the way Jacob left at the end of Eclipse was something more than a normal heartache. He was dealing with something it seemed, far greater than anything anyone could describe. (And I also think that what Bella needed at that time, in order for the broken part of her heart to begin to heal, was for Jacob to be away for awhile.) And Sam's knowing response to Jacob's flee also made me sense something more was going on that just a juvenile broken heart. Sam knew that he was in pain beyond what anyone could have helped him with.

Now, could Jacob really have left if he had actually imprinted on her? Hm, maybe not. But no werewolf that we're aware of has ever been in the same position as Jacob. Sam was in love with Leah before he imprinted on Emily, true, and it changed him; but the women being imprinted upon were not in love with others when the boys imprinted on them. Imprinting does not change the way the women feel (or boys, I guess, if we're now counting Leah), but rather, the level of commitment/devotion/love grows on them.

Obviously I'm completely steadfast in my theory, but I think it is a very interesting idea and one that is not out of the realm of possibility. I'm curious if others have considered the same possibility, and can't wait to see if anything about this comes up in Breaking Dawn.
I believe that you have a very good theory and thats why I like these forums because you are able to express your thoughts and feelings.
But hate to tell you that Jacob did not imprint on Bella. When you imprint, like you said, you become what that person wants you to be and you do what that person wants you to do. This all happens when you first turn into a wolf. When Jake turned, and saw Bella for the first time, she asked him a lot of questions and demanding things from him. He refused and turned her away. If he had imprinted on her, he would have answered all her questions there and then. This doesn't happen therefore he never imprints on her and tries to force an imprint later in the story.
I had thought that maybe Leah would imprint on Jake but that doen't happen either because Leah does not behave well with Jake at all so there is no trace of imprint there either.

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Imprinting?

Post by LongLostCullen » Tue Jul 08, 2008 11:20 pm

I have to admit my thoughts on this are rather...mixed. I can see it from both sides. Imprinting doesn't really give you a say. You see this person and suddenly your whole universe revolves around them. Is it fair? Unfair? It's fair in the sense that you don't have to search the world over for your 'soulmate' it's unfair in the sense you have no say. But the love is no more diminshed had you had the choice. It's like Bella's love for Jacob is eclipsed by her love for Edward. In a sense Bella and Edward 'imprinted' on each other. They have this supernatural gravitation toward each other. Almost as if they had no choice but does that diminsh their love. No. Imprinting is like the real world of relationships. We break hearts and we have our hearts broken. Sam broke Leah's heart but he ended up with his soulmate. Given the choice I think we would choose our soulmate over a great love of our life. But back to the topic. Is fair? Yes and No. It all depends on the acceptance of the situation you were put in. With Quil and Claire I'm sure it was so confusing for Quil. But the pull and love he has for Claire isn't sexual or romantic it's simply love, more than love actually. Imprinting is one of the complexes where you decide for yourself. If I was imprinted upon or I imprinted on somebody would it matter to me since I had no choice. No. Because that person is the one tethering me to the planet. The choice of whether or not I would have them seems rather silly at that point. Thank you all for putting up with my late night sleep deprivation babble.
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