Was Edward an idiot to leave Bella in NM?

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Bellaslullaby
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Post by Bellaslullaby » Wed Jul 02, 2008 8:09 pm

I know he meant it to be good, but it wasn't. It's not like he would have known, but after he was in so much pain he should have just checked on her while she was sleeping, to see if she was feeling the same way.. i guess the way i'm thinking is that it was a really stupid mistake to leave her, but it was in fact a mistake. I think Edward's error and stupidity lies in the fact of thinking that either one of them could deal with it better than the other.. if he wasn't getting over it, neither was she! He could and should have kept some surveillance (sorry about spelling) on her through the transition or lack there-of. she wouldn't even know about it most likely, it just needed to be there.
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Sasha
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Post by Sasha » Wed Jul 02, 2008 8:26 pm

December wrote: Can I ask you about this?
I wrote a bit about the question of selfishness on page 7, and I'm wondering if my speculations in that post were right. Whether you (and Lomesir22 and others) see Edward's decision as selfish
That's part of it. But mostly what I meant is that Edward knew that if he did not leave he would, in the end, (a) accidentally bite Bella, or, (b) bite Bella on purpose. And, seeing as how he sees being turned into a vamp as being damned for eternity, I can understand why he left. Not just for Bella, who, yeah, would be damned into eternity. But also for himself, because he didn't think he could live with having done that to someone he loved.

Also, I think I forgot to mention in my other post... I don't think Edward was wrong in leaving (though I hate his surface reason for it (protect Bella) and the way he did it), but I do think he was wrong in coming back. Bella was just beginning to heal, his plan was just beginning to work. Bella was moving on. And then he came back, and it was as if the whole thing never happened.
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Post by Cocoa » Wed Jul 02, 2008 9:01 pm

Sasha wrote:And then he came back, and it was as if the whole thing never happened.
I agreed with most of what you said though this last line caught me a bit. Only because the entire book of Eclipse was about Edward having to face the consequences of that initial action.
acting23doll wrote:Edward HAD to leave Bella. It makes their love so much stronger.
I pulled this statement (not to single you out) but to point out a trend in the opinions I have read. I believe it is quite a large misnomer that Edward or Bella's love grew stronger from his leaving. Through Edward's leaving he didn't grow to love Bella more (you can't get more then infinite love), you can say that he realized how much she loved him...but not that either of their love expanded because of the leaving.
Stephenie wrote: If Edward had never tried to leave Bella, would it be right to say that he truly loved her?
This question harkened back to the same feelings I had over the "strength of their love". I don't believe his leaving to be the ultimate demonstration of his love for Bella. But rather a force of his personality. If I put myself in Edward's place and my husband in Bella's. I would not be able to leave as Edward did. Not because I don't love him as much as Edward loved Bella, but because I have a complete inability to say No to my husband. He, like Bella would have asked me to stay and I would not have been able to deny the request. Does that mean I don't love him? Of course not, it just means I am a jelly fish when he asks me to do something for him.

So again I say, his leaving was not a demonstration of the strength of his love, but rather the strength of his personality or as some would say the strength of his character.

The love was just that...love - infinite and all encompasing - it never changed, that was the point.
Last edited by Cocoa on Wed Jul 02, 2008 9:11 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Sarah&Edward
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Post by Sarah&Edward » Wed Jul 02, 2008 9:06 pm

I think Edward was incredibly naiive in thinking that by leaving, he would be helping Bella. However, I think he did it with the best intentions. I know he had his reasons, which he believed were accurate at the time, and that upon his reuniting with Bella, he realized that they would just have to be together forever.

I don't believe that Edward was selfish; he was in love, worried, and wanted to do what he believed was the best for Bella. He's quite honorable in his selflessness.
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Post by partyinforks » Wed Jul 02, 2008 9:17 pm

I really didn't know how to feel. I still sort of don't because I can make myself reread that. I cried so much the first time, I can't put myself through that pain again. I felt like I was Bella, I could really feel her pain. As soon as he left was like " Do I even want to read this now? how could it get better?" ( of course I did read it :) ) but for the longest time I was so mad at Edward, and then Sad too because when I found out why he did it and how it hurt him, I was all confused on how to react. So I can still say that I really don't know if he was dumb or not. I mean, he thought by leaving her, she would be safer. But she was still in danger but he didn't know that. So, hmmm....I really don't know.
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HIS HEART WAS IN THE RIGHT- HIS ACTIONS IN THE WRONG

Post by xXawesomeXx » Wed Jul 02, 2008 10:34 pm

I THINK THAT WHEN EDWARD WAS LEAVING HIS HEART WAS IN THE RIGHT PLACE- HE DID IT FOR HER AND ONLY HER BUT EDWARD SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT NO MATTER WHAT BELLA WAS GOING TO GET HERSELF HURT(MAGNET) AND, LIKE HE SAVED HER FROM JASPER AND JAMES, HE WAS THE ON WHO COULD SAVE HER
I DO THINK THAT HIS PROMICE WAS DUMB, BECAUSE a)LIKE THAT WOULD EEVER BE POSSIBLE, HE KNEW HOW HEFELT AND HE KNEW THAT SHE HAD STONGER EMOTIONS THAN HIM b)AND IF YOU READ THE EXTRA ON STEPHENIES WEBSITEE IT SAID THAT EVERY TIME THAT HE THOUGHT ABOUT GOING BACK(WHICH WAS OFTEN) HE WOULD SHOOT IT DOWN because "I PROMISED"
HOW STUPID
GOOD THING HE COULDNT KEEP THE PROMICE AFTER HE SAW HER
:P
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Post by skatepixie » Wed Jul 02, 2008 11:32 pm

I think Edward and Bella can both be selfless to a fault. Like, Edward hated to leave her, but did so to protect her, not realizing that being without him was worse than death for Bella. I think in a way, he failed to listen to her about stuff (ie biting her) and so it was partly his fault. She meant it when she told him she wanted to be with him...but he was so determined to protect her.

I mean, I can understand it. The guy waited 100+ years for her. He doesn't want to lose her, but he doesnt want to do anything selfish or what he considers immoral to keep her. He doesnt want to take her soul (and honestly, could people as good as Edward and Carlisle and Esme lack souls?) and he doesn't want to bring her danger, either.

Eventually, he had to realize that biting her is the only option they can both live with...

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Post by Quickening » Thu Jul 03, 2008 1:52 am

It's incredibly rare to see two people as devoted to one another as Edward and Bella are to eachother. Edward knows how he feels, but I think it's pefectly understandable for him to have underestimated the depth of Bella's feelings for him. Most girls would have been able to move on, and would have been better off.

If he could read her mind, he'd have known better.

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Post by ReneeMonty » Thu Jul 03, 2008 4:30 am

Wel if you see it from Bella's pov in the beginning when he left. It is wrong and not justified at all, she was in so much pain it was unbearable! But if you look to Edward's pov it is justified. He had very good reasons but it hasn't worked out very well.... He did it all for Bella it hurt him to do it but he did it after all. It was for Bella allright she didn't took it very well but how could he knew that? He really thought it was the best for her and if you think it through i can see why he thought that. Even the best intensions can go wrong. :wink: And i forgave him the moment i understanded why he left. Bella has forgiven him so why don't we do the same. 8)

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Post by Edward_Addict » Thu Jul 03, 2008 8:59 am

NovemberAlice wrote:i think that it's another case of "he ment well". he never thought that it would hurt that bad on both sides.
he didn't know how painful true love feels like until he left bella. :shock:
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